well TRYING to choose on days like today, to have a heart of anything other than full blown anger, impatience and did i mention anger towards my children...is tough. But it is do-able. In Him it is do-able.
I've got the flu. So does Zip which makes for a whinging very snotty baby. Stass also is not all that well. We've had an open door recently to our home for lots of hospitality occassions and it has been wonderful but when you live like that (which we believe is part of our calling) you also have to be prepared to rest when you can and I haven't been doing as much of that as I probably should. We've also still been homeschooling, still doing safe diets, having alot of people here for chatting, prayer and conversations that reach down deep into the heart...very crucial life changing stuff. Incredibly important stuff.
So when my kids show very immature attitudes, have shocking temper tantrums, disobey direct instructions, hurt each other, cry over the small stuff with chucking-themselves-on-the-floor kind of moments - THIS IS WHEN the whole 'have a heart' stuff HAS to kick in.
Have prayed lots of 'Please God come to my aid now. Help me be patient now' kind of prayers today. Sleep is needed. Wisdom and patience are needed. Cool air is needed. A break is needed. Love is needed. God is needed.
AND He IS HERE in the midst of us even when there must be consequences for actions, even when there are tears and strain. He is here showing, guiding, teaching, His presence abounding in the midst of it all. And i am so thankful for that.
I don't correct and discipline on my own. I don't love on my own. I don't teach on my own. He is all that and so much more to me and through me to my charges.
Today I am asking Him to give me His heart for His children.
More another time,